“Let’s Give This Another Shot,”
He said, lowering his palm to the pale wood grain. I raised my hand and drove the hammer down as hard as I could. The nail stayed in place. Again. Nothing. I was really trying. And I think he noticed, but that wasn’t enough for him.
“You keep looking towards the window.”
I wanted to see the sky, and be outside, properly. This nail wasn’t going anywhere, let alone turning into a functioning drawer. There’s plenty more going on that I could be doing.
I’m just pretty tired.
I don’t know if I was actually tired. Tired of this, yes. Tired of hearing him in my ear and watching a nail stay in the same place, yes. But I probably could have energy. If I was outside, maybe. And if I was talking to someone else, maybe. That would be nice.
“You’ll never last on your own if you can’t learn this sort of stuff,”
This is what never makes sense to me. Isn’t the whole point of it all that I’m not on my own. We have other people to build drawers. We all do different things, that’s the whole point of it all. I can buy a desk, I can always buy a desk. It is tiring.
Well I don’t plan on being on my own.
Alright, I guess that worked. I don’t want to upset him, really, but he wasn’t getting it. He stood up and brushed off his green cargo pants with his fingers. The dust flew into the air and got caught in the sunlight from the window. He probably isn’t even looking at it.
“Alright. I guess if you don’t want to try”
What is that even supposed to mean? I don’t want to build a fucking desk from scrap wood. Obviously not. There are a billion other people in this world who are busy doing more important things than that. Minimum. I shrugged.
I’m going to make some tea.
I marched out of the shack, passed the deck, walked into the house, and took a well-deserved nap.